2007-10-02
So today, I woke up. I was thinking of brushing my teeth but that would have involved getting out of bed first. I didn't want to get out of bed. But I really wanted to brush my teeth. I was so warm in bed all snuggled up under the covers. My morning mouth was horrible and I couldn't stand the smell ... or the icky, gluey feeling. It was kind of like that time I forgot to put my shoes on in that Tijuana whorehouse ... except for my feet, not my mouth. I hadn't yet opened my eyes but had opened my mouth to make a bunch of loud smacking noises. I was hoping I might be in bed with somebody so they could get up and bring me my toothbrush, toothpaste and a cup of water. The smacking sounds didn't seem to be working so I felt the other side of the bed to see if there was anyone there to nudge awake. Nope. I was just about to resign myself to the fact that I was going to have to open my eyes when my Princess Diana commemorative pinky ring hit something with a clanking sound. I grabbed at it. It was shaped like a bottle. Halleluiah. I took a drink.
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